The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Panties = found
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
