Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
