Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
