and she was petting her beer can
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
