Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Slut skills are useful in every country.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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