But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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