If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
