i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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