My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Randomize
