see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
