Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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