is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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