Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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