you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize
