The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
