And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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