The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Randomize
