Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
