I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
