You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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