i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
you made out with another girl for some wings
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
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