I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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