at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
