You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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