I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Couch. On fire.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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