I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
