Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
