the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
