last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize