I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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