I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
