Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
