i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
