i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
