Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
