She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
