false alarm. still invincible.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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