rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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