he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
