This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
