He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
