he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize