Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
