A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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