around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
The struggles of a small town man whore
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
