Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
