All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
