WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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