On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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