He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
